I am starting a new website because why not? I am taking a zero day in Waynesboro (VA) and using the hotel for all it’s worth.
Once upon a time there was a girl hiking the Appalachian Trail. Like many of her fellow female colleagues, it seemed harder to get a trail name than the guys who would dub each other with mildly humorous and sometimes embarrassing monikers quite easily. This made her sad as she was really looking forward to being anonymous on the trail, creating a bit of a new identity. Her real first name always made her think of moms who were ten to fifteen years older and maybe lived through ‘nam, or otherwise of bleached blondes from California who were quasi-hippie members of The Babysitter’s Club. That was not her.
One day around two weeks in said protagonist (hopefully not antagonist) rolled up to a beautiful campsite near a river with Long Cloud and Not Even. Everyone was talking about how beautiful the site was, nature is awesome, hiking is awesome, yada yada. Then one of the guys mentions, “What I really wanted to do is write, like, a haiku or something about pooping in the middle of this campsite.”
Your protagonist author isn’t fazed by this mention of more dirty bodily function, being an acupuncturist and all. Nope. Not her immediate thought at all.
“Hey, Haiku. That’s a good trail name.”
“Oh yeah, you don’t have a trail name yet. Cool. It’s yours.”
“Um….isn’t a trail name supposed to be relevant to something I did? I didn’t do anything for it.”
“Naw, it’s cool.”
I decide to take matters into my own hands and prove myself worthy.
I didn’t have a name.
Then they gave me a trail name.
Now I’ve a trail name.
They all agreed “didn’t” was actually two syllables despite my pronouncing it with a horrible version of an urban or Southern or something accent, so I changed it to “di’n’t” to satisfy everyone. This was deemed entirely acceptable and so I became Haiku.